Embracing 'Gluttony': My Personal Growth Strategy

So... this comes after spiralling out of control, over-thinking about what I should post next and trying to develop something to prove that I'm worth my salt. I ended up just doing absolutely nothing. Completely counter to "growth".

This post, then is a personal reminder - I'm my main audience. It's funny because I've taken this bad habit from my company: over-engineering for zero users. It sounds so stupid, but it happens and I don't need other people to confirm it since it just happened to me with just writing a blog post to an audience of zero... and I know plenty friends who get stuck in the same situation.

Backstory: buffet lines have been my greatest weakness all my life. I'd stuff myself silly every time I got the chance. Even now, as a man in his 30s, I occasionally cannot think straight in the presence of food. I'd actually get tunnel vision till I'm halfway through my meal.

I've since learned some basic handles to dealing with food, especially when I'm in social contexts. However, I've also learned, with my growing practice of self-awareness, that I have always been "gluttonous" in 'nature'. I don't mean that lightly.

I've always wanted the best of things, and I also wanted everything. Even now, when I'm thinking about my career, a business, or anything related to my hobbies, this nature holds true.

As I have started to take wealth management seriously and move towards this concept of "growth" in the most holistic sense for myself, I also realise that I'm gluttonous. I want the best of everything. Let me explain...

Simplistically, something that feels like it's been beaten into my head for the longest time is that everyone needs to "niche down". In competitive games, people have roles which they spend all their effort to fulfil - support; carry; tank; top lane; mid lane; etc. In business, you can't aim for everything because you won't get anything. I wouldn't know since I'm new but that's what everyone says. In content creation, it's about "finding your niche". In web development, if I wanted to make a website, I need to build my website around a NICHE. In creating a freaking blog, I also have to consider niching down.

It's that very reason why my earlier two posts were focused on "growth" and whatever concept of it I had in my mind before. However, you know what came with cutting down what I want to explore and write about? My soul.

This entire year I spent literally month after month "niching down" and "specialising" so that I can achieve so much more from being FOCUSED like how a magnifying glass focuses then sun's rays to cause a small fire.

So, I'm not saying that these are bad advice. But I AM saying that they're bad advice for me at my current context: no business, no viewers... nothing, I got got nothing.

Instead of worrying about what people will say and how I need to position myself, this was supposed to just be a creative outlet and a place for me to document my voice, my life, my journey. Why care so much?

In the same way, I'm not being paid as a specialist for a very specific skillset. Why do I need to focus on getting really good at one thing when I can get kinda good at many things and doing that makes me happy?

So this post is just a personal dedication to myself, my enjoyment, my fulfilment. That's it. I will stop overthinking the process when I just need to do, do, do.

This blog, then, will be the documentation of THAT growth, my growth. I'm gonna get really fat with all these things I want to do because they're FUN - not because I can earn a quick buck from doing something I'm completely clueless about.

So this is my love letter to all the T-shaped specialisation messages or whatever other optimal practice/business framework for some super amazing, money making strategy: the affair was fun but you're ruining my life. I don't think we're meant for each other and I'm just going to get wasted trying out all these different things I've always wanted to do. I probably won't be very good at one things specifically, but I'd be a one-man circus eventually or something? That should be kinda entertaining and worth something at least?

So this is what my blogs going to be about: unadulterated chaos and messiness. But at least it's real and I genuinely hope that this personal documentation I leave will be able to just help someone who is stuck in this same rut. And hopefully by the time someone finds this, I'll be in a much better place to help too.

I'll probably write the whole list of things I wanna do in a different post to not dilute the main message I wanted with this one. Yep.